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So who was the first guy to see an egg come out of a chickens аss and say, "I'm gonna eat that"?

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I like how a you can use a racial joke as a census... 100 kickass votes and 1 lame... We all know who that guy is lol

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Clapping:
(verb)
Repeatedly high-fiving yourself for someone else's accomplishments.

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Baba sent his brother a birthday cake, air mail. He wanted him to get it while the candles were still burning.

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The Pink Panther’s To Do list:
- To do.
- To do.
- To do, to do, to do, to do, to doooo

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Me and my mate went to a bank robbers-themed fancy dress party last night.
Well I did. He stayed in the car, keeping the engine running.

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Every morning, I jog around my block 15 times. Then I pick up the block and put it back in my toy chest.

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Why did the Jolly Green Giant get kicked out of the garden?
He took a pea.

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Q. What do witches put on their hair when they are going out????
A. Scare-spray

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My younger brother recently became involved with drugs and it’s totally turned his life upside down. He now drives a Porche and has his own house which he paid for in cash.

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I think there should be a Spanish-style siesta in this country -- from about half 11 in the morning until Thursday.

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What did the father tree say to his little sapling?
You’re a chip off the old block

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Whenever you tell someone you're afraid to fly, they're like, 'You know, it's the safest way to travel.' Really? I think walking beats it. I never been walking along and just burst into flames and then fell 20,000 feet. Maybe it's just the way that I walk, though. I'm a real careful walker.

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Do you know why electricians are some of the smartest people?
They always keep up with current events.

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A nice box of chocolates provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

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Beauty comes from within -- like gas.

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Two guys were fishing on the Ohio River. One catches the biggest catfish either one has ever seen. He says to his buddy, “We need to remember this spot so we can come back here again.” His buddy pulls a pen out of his pocket and makes a big ‘X’ on the bottom of his boat. The first guy looks at his buddy, shaking his head in disgust. “You idiот- what if we bring another boat next time?”

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Q. What does a Mancunian call a table laden with Неrоin, Сосаinе, Skunk, GBH, Vаliuм, Spice, Methadone, Ecstasy and LSD?
A. Buffet.
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