Alabama jokes

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Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to Alabama?
Everyone has the same DNA.

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What's the best thing to ever come out of Alabama?
I-20 and I-10

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How does a man from Alabama hold up his pants?
With a bible belt.

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Why did they build the Mercedes plant so close to the University of Alabama?
Because they have an endless supply of crash test dummies right down the road.

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Why is Auburn always in the dark?
Because they're afraid of Alabama Power.

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What's the best road sign in Auburn?
Tuscaloosa - 120 miles

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What is 20 feet long and has 5 teeth?
The funnel cake line at the Alabama state fair.

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What is the most common line used by an Auburn alum?
Would you like fries with that?

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What do you call a genius at Alabama?
Visitor.

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Whats the difference between Alabama and cheerios?
One belongs in a bowl. The other doesn't!

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Why did Forrest Gump choose 'Bama over UF?
He wanted an academic challenge!

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What does a South Alabama grad call a Crimson Tide grad in 5 years?
Boss! I'm not saying Auburn basketball players are dumb, but the coach is dressing six players for this Saturdays game. The rest will dress themselves.

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Why did the University of Alabama regents decide to cover Bryant-Denny Stadium in cardboard?
Because the Crimson Tide always look better on paper.

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What happens when blondes move from Mississippi to Alabama?
Both states become smarter!

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What is the only intelligent sign of life in Tuscaloosa, Alabama?
Auburn, Alabama: 159 Miles

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Why aren't Troy State cheerleaders allowed to do the splits?
They stick to the ground.

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Why do all the trees in Mississippi lean east?
Alabama Sucks

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What does a girl from Auburn do if she's not in bed by 10pm?
Go Home.

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