Jokes

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Suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry

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Someone rареd my ear, now I have hearing aids

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A реdорhilе and a little boy are walking into the woods late at night.
The little boy says, “I’m scared.”
The реdорhilе says, “You think you’re scared? I have to walk back alone!”

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How did Helen keller’s mom punish her? She put her in a circular room and told her to find the corner.

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Why do pedophiles never win a race?
Because they are always coming in a little behind.

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What do a реdорhilе and a clock have in common…neither of them go pass 12.

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Ahh Love

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Fatty and skinny were in a bed. Fatty rolled over and skinny was dead.

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Dont say your life is a joke because jokes got meaning.

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A son walks up to his dad and says
"Dad! I just had sеx for the first time."
The dad goes
"Great! Wanna sit down and talk about it?“
The son says
"I cant sit right now, my вuтт is very sore.”

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The doctor says to the woman there was good and bad news. the woman says she wants the bad news first the doctor says the bad news is the baby had red hair. then he said the good news is it is dead.

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It’s sad because with all these mean jokes Stephen hawkings can’t even Stand up for himself

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Man asks a women: Are you a school?
Women: No why?
Man: Oh i wanted to shoot my kid inside of you.

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I entered ten puns into a contest to see which one would win.
No pun in ten did

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If you push some one that’s bullying, if you кill some one that’s мurdеr, if there is no evidence it’s nothing

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My favorite quote will always be, “Sketchy candy is better than no candy”

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What’s the difference between a school and a isis military base?
Don’t ask me I only fly the drone…

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Everything dissapers in the Bermuda triangle
Except my depression

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