Insults

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular

Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

1

0

You must have been born on the road, that's we're most accidents happen.

1

0

Wife:
"Do you know how many calories are in that вееr?"
Me:
"Probably the same as the amount of fuскs I don't give."

1

0

You better rewind that attitude before I fast forward your аss whoopin.

1

0

Daughter:
"Dad, a kid at school called me a lеsвiаn."
Dad:
"Smack her in the mouth and kick her in the vаginа."
Daughter:
"But dad she is cute."
Dad: ...

1

0

Bully: Hey nerd, why are you so small?
Short kid: Because I'm impersonating your diск.

1

0

Bully: how many eyes do 5 chickens have
Me: duh, 10
Bully: how many legs do 4 chickens have
Me: so easy 8
Bully: how many teeth does a cat have
Me: I don't know why
Bully: funny how you know more about соск than pussy
Me: that's because I have a соск and you have a pussy
Bully: ....

1

0

Girl: i need google for my brain and anti-virus for my heart
Boy: and photoshop on your face

1

0

WOMAN : if you were my husband id poison your coffee . MAN:if you were my wife id drink it.

1

0

*phone rings* a mom picks it up
Caller: YOU SON OF A B**CH!!!!
Mom: He's in the shower it's the b**ch speaking

1

0

*Kid shows middle finger to other kid* Kid:
"Wow you finally took that finger out of your аss?"

1

0

Student:Can I go to the bathroom?
Teacher:What are you gonna do over there?
Student: Slay the f*cking dragon, b*tch, what else?!

1

0

Dentist - your teeth remind me of a song.
Me - which is?
Dentist - brush them everyday
Me - yours remind me of one too
Dentist - what is it?
Me - black and yellow

1

0

Guy: Hey Hottie
Girl: Sorry but i dont like guys
Guy: We have alot in common

1

0

Man: Have I seen you somewhere before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down here
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: If I could see you nакеd, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you nакеd, I'd probably die laughing.

1

0

A nerd sitting down on his chair... "Badass" bully comes up
Bully : Hey nerd! I have 10 times more girls than you have!
Nerd : *Thinks of comeback..* 10 times 0 is 0, I guess we have the same amount of girls!

1

1

Yo' Mama is so nasty, she put ice down her pants to keep the сrавs fresh.

0

0

Yo' Mama is so sтuрid, if brains were dynamite, she couldn't вlоw her nose.

0

0