Insults

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Guy: I f*cked ur mom last night
Me: I'm sorry I should go tell ur sister ur cheating on her

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When I said "I'd hit that"
I meant with a baseball bat.

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(My friend Angel cracking on this ugly аss white dude)
Ugly аss white dude- Shut up Osama before i report u to the DEA
Angel- Your moms part of my DEA
Ugly аss white dude- Oh yeah whts that?
Angel- Diск Enjoyment Association
Me and my friends- Oh!!!!!!!!!

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Maybe I act like I don't care but, deep down inside.. I still don't give a f*ck.

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Im sorry what'd you say? I have an ear disease called I dont care.

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Sorry i can't understand you when your choking on a diск, fаggот. )'.'(

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Subject: You're ugly.
You: How can I be ugly, I don't look like you.

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Loser:Have you seen the movie Gаy Boy Say No?
You:Im looking at it!
Class:Oooooohhh

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(Sittin in class and you pull out your phone)
Teacher- Young man give me your phone!!
Me- Вiтсh, when u start payin the dамn bills on my phonecthen you can tell me what to do wit it. Ohk? Bye.

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Officer :
- "Please step out of the vehicle sir."
Me :
- "Nah, you're all right I'm too drunк, you come in.

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Roses are red
Violets are blue
Your аss looks fine and so do you
I took you to my place
And everything was fine
Then I said,
"I'll be the six if you be the nine."
So it started out nice
We ended up in bed
Everything got hard so I showed her my head
So we were under the blankets
It was hot so I was about to smuther
I lifted up the blanket and found out it was your mother.

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Bully: nice skinny jeans, you and my sister can match
You: oops, looks like I grabbed the wrong ones after we f*cked last night

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Math is like a рussy, you'll never get it!

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(Mom playing with her child)
Mom-Got your nose!!!!!
Kid- Вiтсh If u got my nose then how the fuск am i still breathing?

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Guy: Haha your a fail
Me: Just like your dad's соndом and your mom's abortion

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Show off: I tattooed my name on my forehead so girls know what to scream when I ваng em
Me: you have a pretty bad mother if she still hasn't learned your name yet

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Guy: where have you been all my life
Girl: hiding from you

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My friend:
"You have terrible aim"
Me:
"Yea, well if you dad had better aim we wouldn't have to deal with you, now would we"

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