Insults

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*Woman gets mad for a guy staring at her воовs*
Woman: Stop staring at my воовs!
Guy: Tell them to stop staring at me!

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Why are men are like public toilets? The good ones are taken, the rest are full of shiт.

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Guy: You support gаy rights so you must be gay
Other Guy: I also support animal rights. DO I LOOK LIKE A FUСКING ALPACA???

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I stopped buying makeup when I wandered into a department store recently and noticed that the makeup sales ladies are starting to dress like research scientists. They're back there with slide rules and computerized skin charts. And you know they probably didn't finish high school, but they're wearing lab coats.

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Fат Girl: lol I hate the gym so much
Guy: Did you mean to put a 'h' there?

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Bully: You have no friends!
Me: Actually I do have friends only that you don't know them because they wouldn't socialize with someone like you.
Everyone: Turn Down For What!!!!!!

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Comeback for gаy people!
Girl: Hey! You Fат Вiтсh! Why You So F*cking Gаy?
Boy: Because Girls Are Вiтсhеs!
Girl: So Your Gаy?! Ha!
Boy: Well At least I Can Get A Boy Friend!
Class: OOOOOOOHHHHHH!!!

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Вiтсh: A wise man once told me to be myself and now I'm way ahead of you in life
Me: Whoever told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice

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You would never be able to live down to your reputation, but I see you're doing your best.

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You're so fake, Barbie is jealous.

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Boy: Hey can I call my mom from your phone? Me: Sure yeah! Just press redial.

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Girlfriend: How much do you love me?
Boyfriend: Well, look at the stars and count them. That's how much I love you.
Girlfriend: But its morning Boyfriend: Exactly

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Son: Dad how is it like to have the best son in the world
Dad: I don't know ask your grandfather
Son: ._.

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Teacher- " What do you call a person who talks about things no one cares about? "
You- " A teacher. "

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Guy:What are the must-sees for the museum?
Me: The exit

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White Guy: Why are your eyes so stretched and small? (Everyone Laughs) Asian Guy: To make your diск look big (Ohhhhhhhhhhhh!)

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Bully: You're ugly, Why do you even bother coming to school.
You: I'm sorry i don't wake up every morning just to impress you.

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You: Dad I just had sеx!
Dad: Really? Come sit down
You: I cant, my but hurts!
Dad:...
Im not a hомо, just a funny joke

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