Life Jokes

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The last thing on earth you want to do will be the last thing you do.

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Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

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Oops. My brain just hit a bad sector.

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Cleavage: The best popcorn catcher.

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Loneliness is when a person always knows where all of his things are.

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The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.

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Incompetence knows no barriers of time or place.

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Life is scary; at least the salary is funny.

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Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-веll prize!

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You're not drunк if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

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Life is a comedy for those who think, but a tragedy for those who feel.

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There's a lot of pretty woman at spring because during other seasons you appreciate them with your brain.

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Every time I find the meaning of life, they change it.

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From all the butts, ours is the most important.

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It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

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Statistically 6 out of 7 Dwarfs are not Happy.

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Why does it feel like time slows down during the day when you're at work and rapidly speeds up at night when you get home?

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Only dead fish go with the flow.

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