Jokes

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So what if I don't know what Armageddon means?
It's not the end of the world!

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Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher?
There was no chemistry.

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Jack and jill went up the hill to do it in the water. jack slipped, his соndом ripped, and now they have a daughter

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“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say.
“Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say.
“Go out with a big, loud ваng!”, that’s what I say.

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Did you know the letter F in orphan stands for family?

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Girls are like blackjack
You shoot for 21 but I keep hitting 14

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A man tried to shoot Adolf Нiтlеr but missed. Then Adolf replied, “Oh shoot, I did nаzi that coming!”

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I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.

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Babies can spread a nasty smell,
Especially when you haven’t fed them for a month.

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Helen Keller walked into a bar. And a chair. And a table. And a wall.

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I do t get why cancer is so hard to beat. I’m already on stage 4

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My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going

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What’s stephen hawkins favorite song?
- They see me rolling.

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I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in room filled with all of my ex’s, so I was completely alone.

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“Don’t be dumb,make sure she’s numb”

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A реdорhilе lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with “Hey girls, would you like some candy?” They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says “God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes”

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Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking’s house? No,he hasn’t either.

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Now that Stephen Hawking is dead the jokes will start to roll in just like he used to.

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