Jokes

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What do suicidal people do in their spare time?
Hang out.

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Being gаy sounds like a pain in the ass

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What is the difference between a coconut and your ex?
One is fun to knock down by throwing rocks at the other one is a coconut.

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Two men are in a rainforest and one of them is peeing. Suddenly a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s реnis. The other man says, “ Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!”. He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suск the poison out. The man wen back to the other man and said, “ There is no hope, you will die.”

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What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? None you are both dead on the inside.

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Y do orphans eat cereal with water
There dad did not come back with the milk

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What’s the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? – People in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi doooo.

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Guy spills milk on a me i say " it’s OK we all make mistakes sometimes but apparently your mom made a big one

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If trees could кill you, they wood.

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My friend can’t afford to pay his water bill anymore, so I sent him a card, “Get well soon.”

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Straight people ask why gаys have such a good fashion sense. Baby we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing.

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Snow everywhere, it’s Christmas time. A person looks at the tree.
The person: Only last thing left to hang!
He grabs a noose.

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Sometimes you just need to take a drive through the city to clear your head

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I’m not lazy, I’m just воnе tired. I bet that one tickled your funny воnе. It sure got me rattled. Don’t try to stop me. I’ve got a skele-ton of these!

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Did you hear that Stephen Hawking wrote a new book…it’s called “Around The House in Eighty Days.”

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I’m made with depression and extra anxiety, then a side of gаy and a sprinkle of emo.

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When you loose a game of Kahoot so you kashoot up the school

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I invented a new word today.
Plagiarism

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