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Мауbе it wouldn't bе so heavy if they used their arms

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What's the point in blurring out the middle finger on television? Like, oh you fooled me, what's behind that blur? An umbrella? An elephant?

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Click kick аss if you think justin bieber is gay

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I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions…

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Yo Forehead is so big. . The photo on yo Driver’s License says “to be continued on the back”

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The toilet paper tried to cross the road he couldnt because he was stuck in a CRACK

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What do you call a guy whose hand is up a horse’s вuтт?
An Amish Mechanic.

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Man looks at his friend and says "if you and a friend go camping and you two get really drunк and in the morning you wake up with a соndом in your вuтт would you tell anyone? " The friend says im a disgusted tone “No” So the man says “ok let’s go camping”

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What is the dofference between mcdonalds and 911
Mcdonalds has a drive through
Twin towers has a fly through

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The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.

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I stayed up all night trying to follow the sun… Then it dawned on me

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I had a dream about the whole ocean was filled with orange soda
Turns out it was a fanta sea

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I had problems milking my соw one morning. It was an udder failure.

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It’s April fools day. I’m gonna go to the orphanage and tell kids their parents are here to pick them up.

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Last night i burned down an orphanage
There was one survivor who said i would regret it
I said “what are you gonna do, tell your parents?”

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Do want to know why they call it an orphanage?
Cause they couldn’t call it orphans home

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Ran out of toilet paper so had to start using lettuce leaves…today was the tip of the iceberg

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Q. Two gаy guys are having sеx, when suddenly the house catches fire. Who gets out of the house first, the guy on top or bottom?
A. They guy on the bottom because he already has his shiт packed.

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