Jokes

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular

What did the "T" say to "here"?
"Are we there yet?"

0

0

The seabird had to have a rest during it's migration because it ran out of "petrel".

0

0

My girlfriend always gets her way by pretending she's crying.
She's using sigh-cology.

0

0

I usually take steps to avoid elevators.

0

0

Mattress: Nothing really mattress.
Armchair: Couldn't chair less.

0

0

The scare crow got promoted to the manager at a supermarket, because he was outstanding in his field

0

0

What do you call a really lazy guy on drugs?
A baked potato.

0

0

How do you measure the intelligence of a vegetable?
With an IQ-cumber!

0

0

If quitters never win,
And winners never quit,
Who made up the saying?
Quit while you're ahead!

0

0

What does Tiger Woods (golfer) and the Queen of England have in common?
Tee time.

0

0

Did you hear about the mushroom that won gold at the Olympics? He was a champignon to his people.

0

0

Do you want to hear a black joke?
No, ill slаvе it for later

0

0

Where do TVs go on vacation?
To remote islands!

0

0

Why did the fungi leave the party?
There wasn't mushroom.

0

0

Q. How do you get bubblegum out of your hair?
A. Cancer.

0

0

When life throws you lemons, make lemonade… But also remember that unless you add water and sugar your lemonade will taste like shiт.

0

0

Me: Hey Miss have you seen the clown that hides from gаy people in Target?
Teacher:No I haven't
Me: Haha LOL
Teacher: Huh....... oh right that's funny detention at lunch.
Me: It was so worth it.

0

0

Do you know the difference between unlawful and illegal?
One is against the law. The other is a sick bird.

0

0