Jokes

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“Doc,” I said, “every time I fаrт the room fills with smoke and stinks of petrol. What’s the matter with me?”
“That’s easy,” he said. “You’re exhausted.”

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The hardest part of becoming a gynecologist is the entrance exam!

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I wanted to go to college to be a farmer.
But, they didn’t have a degree in that field.

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Goob tried to pick me up once so i punched him

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Hey girl are you from jamaica ? because you're jamaican me hоrny. HAHAHAHAHAHA

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Boy: Did you eat Lucky Charms this morning?
Girl: No, why?
Boy: Cause you're looking magically delicious!

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Is your name rose cuz you a pretty flower

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Warning:only do this if your in the library
If you were a library book id check you out

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Did you hear about the guy who drove his Ford Chevy truck into the lake?
It sank... like a rock!

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I went into a posh pub in a pair of filthy overalls and this snotty barman said to me,
“I’m sorry, you can’t come in here dressed like that.”
“OK,” I replied as I left, “fix your own fuскing heating then.”

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The dentist said to his patient, “This is going to hurt a little.”…
The patient replied, “It’s OK doc, I’m ready.” …
The dentist went on, “I’ve been having an affair with your wife for months now.”

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I’m starting a mirror cleaning business.
Its a job I can really see myself doing!!

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Did you just come from KFC? cause' you have a вrеаsт and a thigh and you're giving me a drumstick!

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Are you my boat? Because nice aft!

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Do u believe in love at 1st sight or do u wanna see my skechers light up again?

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GET A JOB if you are reading this or are u to dazed at this comment

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Boy-are u my toe....?
Girl-... No why?
Boy-... Cause i wanna ваng u on the table

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Guy: Miss, do have a bandaid?
Girl: Yes, why?
Guy: Because I scraped my knees when I fell for you!

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