Jokes

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Two girls have a sleepover.
Karen: Let’s go to bed.
Lauren:Fine, but it’s early.
*Karen wakes up and exits room"
Lauren hears noise
Mikey: Your so much better than my girlfriend Karen.
Lauren: laughs
Lauren: remembers her boyfriend is Karen’s brother Mikey

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My ex boyfriend’s diск is so small that instead of giving him a hаndjов I had to give him a thumb and forefinger job.

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The gas prices are going up that even Нiтlеr is killing himself

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My mom said the happier a person is when sick the sooner they get better.
So I went to the hospital hooked up everyone’s breathing masks to laughing gas.

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So a girl says to her ex I can’t get you out of my mind the boyfriend I knew you we’ve the girl replies I see you in everything like when I’m walking down the street even at work like trash cans are everywhere

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A hill billy female has to decide if she would save her brother or her boyfriend. She chose both because her brother is her boyfriend.

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How do you get a Japanese fanclub?
Walk around with a bundle of gas masks!

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Why won’t my boyfriend eat my pie? His brother made it.

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So a guy walks into gas station and walks to the person working and says “can I have a kitcat chuncky” so she gets him one and then he says “no I want a normal kitcat you fат вiтсh”.

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My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.

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The broccoli says ‘I look like a small tree’, the mushroom says ‘I look like an umbrella’, the walnut says ‘I look like a brain’, and the banana says ‘Can we please change the subject?’

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Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the WiFi password

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Santa and Bill Cosby’s favorite quote " don’t be dumb make sure they’re numb and always use a соndом!"

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The joke is me

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Why do women have cleaner minds than men? – Because they change theirs more often.

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I fell from the stairs the other day. it really “got me down”.

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Once my friend was saying something dumb and I was like I Campbell-eve you just said that.

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Why should you wary of stairs? – Because they are always up to something.

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