Jokes

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Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes to the photographer, he shoots himself.

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If u tell a girl there pretty they wont believe u if u tell them their ugly their never forget it…
Elephants never forget.

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Sometimes i feel ugly, then i think of my sister and feel better

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So a girl says your so ugly to me and she says “I’m the prettiest girl” I say “yea a pretty girl for a ogre 👹”

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What do you do when you get rid of prostate cancer?
Cell-ablate!

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Im jealous at me led lights.
Cause they r hanging from the celling ans im not.

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What did the cancer cell say to it’s neighbor?
Mind if I join you?

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A man walks into a bar, the corrections officer says “Usually we open the cell before you go in, now stop bleeding on my floor!”

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I asked my new girlfriend how many men she’d had before me.
She said not to worry, she could count them all on one hand.
Unfortunately, this was when I noticed she’s holding her cell phone with a calculator app open.
I took note of her wallet inside a picture of what appeared to be 10 guys I asked and she said that’s my fam as well I noticed an Alabama drivers license
I asked where which one was her dad she said that she doesn’t talk to him anymore because he had sеx with the boss’s daughter I casually asked what he did for work self employed she said
That’s the last time I use ancestry. Com

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What do cells call their friends with? A cell phone

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I just got a text on my cell воnе be right back

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I’m a fast reader, I can go through 20 stories in a few seconds.

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Ur mom fат lol

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Mother Nature deserves a traffic ticket.
Summer is speeding by way too fast. 🤣🤣🤣

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Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven’t. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, “Nah, they call him that because he doesn’t wear pants.”

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As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast, it has a speed of 1 вullshiт per second.

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What type of tea do you drink with the queen of england?
Royal-tea

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Big Dolly Parton hair like an 80s prom queen

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