Jokes

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The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”

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My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness.
Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!"

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Wife: Honey, i love you
Husband: i love you all
Wife: awwww… Wait WHAT !!!

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The sun is out and the peado vans are out. Parents, keep your kids away from ice cream vans. Once they hear the sound, you’ll never see your kids again.

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Your dad never needed a van for you.

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Peado van peado van stay away, peado van peado van take her away. I can’t afford food, I can’t afford childcare, might aswell just get the money out of her.

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What is black and white and is dead?
My Chemical Romance

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What’s black and white
History

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What’s black and white and hard as nails? A nun on speed!

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I was anonymous, with the previous jokes. I will now go by “I can fly! falls”
What’s black and white and red all over?
A mime i hit with my car.

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Somebody asked Rosa Parks what color the skittles were but she answer everything was black and white

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What’s Michael Jackson’s favourite movie? Black and white.

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What is black and white and sits in a tree?
A fridge wearing a leather jacket XD

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Ok ok buddy buddy buddy aka D…fickenkid, u think u r funny? guess wut ur not racist little bich need to get a life like holy shiт stab urself with a knife making racist comments aint gonna get u friends, tell u how is works when ur talking to my friends. u make no fuскing orphan jokes nah theyre аss and not funny ur gonna change ur name sunny lets say, ok, no more making racist jokes every one is the same, black and white who to blame? we should love them all. and if ur gonna be rood to ALYA and jkmaster ill hunt u down tell u wut u did. ok u got that thx bro…

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Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes to the photographer, he shoots himself.

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If u tell a girl there pretty they wont believe u if u tell them their ugly their never forget it…
Elephants never forget.

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Sometimes i feel ugly, then i think of my sister and feel better

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My friends and I were talking about this really ugly girl at our school. For some reason, she had the same name as me.

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