Jokes

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Do you come here often? Because I'm about to come here right now.

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Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under

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Mom - Son, a little birdie told mme that you have been doing drugs.
Son - It seems to me the only person who has been doing drugs is you, since you apparently talk to birds.

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My Ex Girlfriend had a really weird fetish. She used to dress up as herself and then act like a fuскing вiтсh all the time.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?!
Nobody, BP killed them all.

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If someone just texts you "K", just reply with "L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z"

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I wonder if Meteorologist argue about whose has the biggest Doppler?

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Guess who got back together after all the shiт they've been through?
Your аss cheeks

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I just sharted in my pants. Can I get in yours?

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The вееr diet is not very good for losing weight... However, if you wanna lose a wallet, phone or girlfriend... it's perfect!

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"You know, Nickelback is a really amazing band. The music is really deep & versatile & I really respect them." Said No one ever

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"Hey, is that a keg in your pants? Cause I'd sure love to tap that аss!"

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Why was the students report card all wet? Because it was below C (sea) level.

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Why did the teacher marry the janitor? Because he swept her off her feet!

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I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
With any luck, right after he finishes college.

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If I were a rabbit, I'd jump in your hole!

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Girl your like a trophy bass I dont know whether to eat you or mount you!

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Roses are red
Unicorns are orange
This makes no sense
Peanuts

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