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Periodic table jokes

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
HeHe
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What did the student say after learning all the symbols on the periodic table?
“Fluorine-Uranium-Carbon-Potassium this! Never again!”
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What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
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What’s a pirates favorite element on the periodic table?
Gold. What the hеll would they need argon for?
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A man recently died after a periodic table display fell on him...
The official cause of death was "Exposure to the Elements".
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Elements of the periodic table are being interviewed.
The interviewer asks Oxygen what they are. Oxygen says "I'm a gas."
The interviewer asks Copper what they are. Copper says "I'm a solid."
The interviewer asks Bromine what they are. Bromine says "I'm a liquid."
The interviewer asks Roentgenium what they are. Roentgenium says "I have amnesia."
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I would tell a joke about the periodic table.
But sadly all the good ones argon.
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Eminem is that guy in chemistry class that raps the whole periodic table.
But skips Oxygen.
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There was an election amongst the elements of the periodic table and Iron voted for Zinc... because Zinc was able to galvanize Iron.
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The periodic table just got one block smaller
Scientists now say Plutonium is not a real element
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What did the rest of the periodic table say as gold went home at the end of the day?
Au revoir!
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If you ever encounter an evil witch show them the periodic table
They're good at chemistry
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What element in the Periodic Table of Elements can you not take seriously?
Silly-соn!
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My friend asked me if she could use my periodic table
I said "sorry, I left it atom"
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A world renowned chemist dies. His will states that he wishes for all of his favorite elements from the periodic table be included with his body. They go to his wife and ask "Are we really going to put a bunch of elements in his casket?
To which she replies
"No, just Barium"
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The dying chemist tells his assistant to check the following numbers in the periodic table. Confused, but still wishing to follow his directions, he listens carefully and the chemist lists down the numbers, 10, 23, 47, 8, 7, 47, 53, 23, 63, 92, 15. After listing them down, the assistant tells the chemist he did it, and with a smile, the chemist weakly tells the assistant, "Now, read it."
"Ne V Ag O N N Ag I V Eu U P"
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My chem teacher once asked me what S was on the periodic table, and I didn’t know so I said “the element of Surprise,” apparently he was surprised with my answer.
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How do you track the reproductive cycle of pachyderms?
With the Periodic Table of Elephants.
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