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It'd be frustrating if you seriously couldn't find your friend Marco at a crowded swimming pool.
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Have you heard the joke about the trash can?
It’s ruввish!
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Where do pencils come from? Pencilvania.
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Did you hear about the dyslexic traffic cop who spent the weekend handing out IUD's?
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I went to a drag race last Saturday. I still can't believe the guy in high heels won.
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Two peanuts are walking down the street when one was assaulted (a-salted).
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There are a lot of fish in the sea. Too bad I'm human.
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Why are pirates called pirates? A: Because they arrrr!
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Bernie and Jane are an elderly couple who have decided to get married late in life. While they have not yet been intimate, Bernie thinks it would be a good idea to know how Jane feels about this. He asks her about her desires regarding frequency of sеxuаl intimacy. Jane replies that she likes sеx infrequently. Bernie, being ever the optimist says,
"Is that one word or two?"
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Whore and Bungee Jumper
Der Sohn beim Bungee-Jumping?
- Você teria coragem de praticar bungee jumping? - Claro que não! - Por quê? - Cara, eu vim parar neste mundo por causa de uma borrachinha que arrebentou e não quero sair dele pelo mesmo motivo.
What do a bungee jump cord and a hooker have in common? If the rubber breaks you
- Vet du vad det är för likhet mellan att hoppa bungyjump och att pippa en polsk hora? - Nä? - Om gummit spricker så är du dödens.
Was haben ein Puff und ein Bungeesprung gemeinsam? Beides kostet 100 Euro. Der Höhepunkt ist kurz. Und wenn das Gummi reißt, hat man ein Problem!
Vad är det för likhet med att vara otrogen och att hoppa bungyjump? Svar: Först vet man inte om man vågar, men sedan går det åt helvete om inte gummit håller.
Saar en Moos wonen al 25 jaar samen.
Wat is een overeenkomt tussen een prostituee en bungeejumpen? Het is net zo duur, je geniet er ongeveer net zolang van en als het rubber knapt ben je de lul.
- Какво е общото между проститутка и бънджи скок? - И двете са евтини, бързи и ако гумата се скъса си мъртъв...
- Vet du vad det är för likhet mellan att hoppa bungyjump och att vara otrogen? - Nä? - Först vet man inte om man vågar, sen går det snabbt och så går det åt helvete om gummit inte håller!
Hvad er ligheden med en prostitueret og prøve bungee jumping?– Du er død, hvis gummiet går i stykker.
Qual a semelhança entre uma ida ao bordel e um salto de bungee jumping? Ambos custam 200 reais, o clímax é muito rápido e, quando a borracha se rompe, eis o problema.
(asta-i cu asemanare de fapt) Q: Care-i asemanarea dintre o prostituata si un elastic de bungee-jumping ? A: Amandoua costa 75$, iar daca s-a rupt cauciucul esti halit.
Was haben Bungee-Jumping und Sex gemeinsam? - Beides geil bis der Gummi reißt.
Vet du vad det är för likhet mellan en kondom och bungyjump? Det går åt helvete om gummit spricker!
A condom and bungee jumping are exactly alike, if the rubber breaks, your f**ked.
What does bungee jumping and shagging a hooker have in common?.... Awesome at first but if the rubber snaps your f*cked!
How are sеx and bungee jumping related? When the rubber breaks, you're sсrеwеd!
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A tourist from Romania visits New York City. He wanders around sightseeing and gets lost. He asks one of the locals for directions to get back to his hotel. The local notices the tourist's foreign accent and asks, "Are you by any chance Russian?" The Romanian replies,
"No, I'm not really in a hurry."
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A turtle that was crossing the street was mugged one day. The policemen came to help and asked him what happened. He replied, "I am not sure, it happened too fast."
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What's the biggest pencil in the world?
Pennsylvania.
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What's Mario's favorite fabric? Denim, denim, denim.
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What do you call a cake made out of hamburgers? A patty cake!
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A friend of mine got sacked from the dodgem cars; he's suing for funfair dismissal!
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Why didn't the paraplegic look in the mirror?
He couldn't stand to see himself like that.
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A man walks into a restaurant and sits down to order. The waiter walks up and takes the order. Before he is done taking his order, the waiter asks the man, "Would you like a soup or salad?" The man replies,
"What's a super salad?"
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