Flirt jokes

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Girl, do you need to get your protein macros up?
Because I'd gladly put my meat inside you.

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Wanna go on an 'ate' with me? I'll give you the 'D' later.

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Do you work at a cattery?
Because I wanna be covered in рussy.

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I wanna go inside your wine cabinet and pull myself out a stiff one.

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Let's not mess with nature.
We are here to make babies.
So, let's get to it.

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I just checked my schedule and I can have you pregnant by Christmas.

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Girls are like Internet Domain names, the ones I like are already taken.

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Are you a shark?
Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.

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Brrr! My hands are cold.
Can I warm them in your heaving вrеаsтs?

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I'm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.

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Trafic policeman: "Didn't you hear my whistle, madam?"
Woman driver: "Yes, but I don't like flirting while I'm driving."

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Two monsters went to a Halloween party.
Suddenly one said to the other, "A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?"
The other monster replied, "Be a gentleman and roll them back to her."

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Hey girl, your body reminds me of Mcdonalds, because I'm loving it!

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Boy: "You know unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy"
Girl: "Why are you leaving?"

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Boy: "Hi, my name is Milk. I'll do your body good."
Girl: "Sorry, I'm Lactose intolerant!"

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Two old people flirt at a seniors' singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a full night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?"
The old woman replies shyly, "Depends... ."
"Depends on what?" he asks.
"On my bottom - where else?!"

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There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

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Been chatting to a 14 yr old on the internet.
She is funny, sеxy and flirty.
Now she tells me she is an undercover cop.
How cool is that at her age!

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