Last words of a skydiver?
Oh crap, those annoying clothes moths!!!
Judge: “Why did you steal the car?”
Man: “I had to get to work.”
Judge: “Why didn’t you take the bus?”
Man: I don’t have a driver’s license for the bus.
Father: “Son, you were adopted.”
Son: “What?! I knew it! I want to meet my biological parents!”
Father: “We are your biological parents. Now pack up, the new ones will pick you up in 20 minutes.”
I have a very good feeling about my job interview today. The manager said they were looking for somebody responsible.
“You’ve found your man,” I responded, “whenever there was a problem in my last job, they always said that I was responsible!”
I made a beginner’s mistake and went shopping on an empty stomach.
I am now the happy owner of aisle 7.
Why did my washing machine stop pumping out water?
- And more importantly, where is my hamster?
Job interviewer: “And where would you see yourself in five years’ time Mr. Jeffries?"
Me:"Personally I believe my biggest weakness is in listening."
At an interview:
“In the beginning, you’ll be earning 20 000, later on it can go up to 40 000.”
“OK, I’ll come again later then.”
